Saturday, March 13, 2010

Lent Reflections: Condemned by the Righteous

Wow.  This last week’s study has been so convicting.  And very difficult.  I see myself in so many parts of this story – the overly righteous, so convinced that I am right; the quiet one standing by, knowing what is happening is wrong, yet not saying anything, just letting it happen around me; the rash, reacting one, following behind yet denying who I really am.

A lot of my thoughts are stuck on the Sanhedrin.  I know that I have been both  inside the Sanhedrin and standing outside of the Sanhedrin, calling them hypocrites, at various times in my life.  In the story, the Sanhedrin are the top 71 holy men of the time.  Probably at the top of the social ladder.  They had control; they could tax.  Caiaphas was the leader of the Sanhedrin and, most likely, his power was handed down to him from his father-in-law with Rome’s blessing.  I can imagine him bragging to the others of the times he has convinced Rome of something, or perhaps he spent time at Pilate’s – whether as part of a larger gathering or maybe they were friendly.  As friendly as a Roman and Jewish leader could be.  It was likely a relationship that was mutually beneficial.  Caiaphas could keep the Jews under control and gather more taxes for Rome and Pilate could look the other way as taxes were skimmed off the top.

Whatever the relationship, Caiaphas saw Jesus as a threat to his way of life.  Jesus was preaching change, a new kingdom and his reaction to the merchants in the temple was probably the last straw for Caiaphas.  Caiaphas and the others used Judas to arrest Jesus and had to have some sort of preplanning going on – how else do they gather all 71 members of the Sanhedrin in the middle of the night after the most important meal in the Jewish faith?  If the disciples couldn’t stay awake, how were they able to gather all of the members of the Sanhedrin so quickly? And the witnesses?  There was a mob of people at this trial and no Twitter or Facebook to make these arrangements at the last minute.

Fear is a powerful motivator and this story is filled with fear.  Fear can create an angry mob and people can easily fall into this mob even if they don’t agree with the direction the mob is taking.  It’s hard to believe that all 71 members of the Sanhedrin followed Caiaphas’ train of thought.  Nicodemus and Joseph of Arimathea are part of the Jewish leaders: Nicodemus as a “leader of the Jews” (John 3:1) and Joseph is listed as a “respected member of the council” (Mark 15:43).  Were they at the trial?  We are told both were “secret” followers of Jesus.  If they were part of the 71, why didn’t they speak up?  How many times have I been that person?  The one who knew what was happening wasn’t right, yet didn’t say anything, who sat by and fought the urge to speak up?

And then there’s Peter.  Peter, the hotheaded one, who loved Jesus so, yet denied knowing him 3 times that night.  But he was there.  He followed the arresting mob. John also followed, but it seems John was allowed in – which is probably the only way we know what happened at the trial – though I wonder where was John?  Was he right in the trial, or only allowed to stand outside?  We didn’t really discuss John on the inside, so I’m just going to write about Peter.  We focus so many times on the denials, that we forget that he was there.  Jesus was able to LOOK at him when Peter denied him the third time.  There are theories that try to exonerate Peter, but those theories would involve Peter having foreknowledge of what was going to happen and to plan through why he should deny knowing Jesus and I just don’t think Peter planned that far ahead.  We know Peter to be impetuous and reactionary.  I think Peter was curious and wanted to know what was happening, yet was scared, so very scared for his life.  I know there have been times that I have denied God, by words or deeds, but my life has never been on the line.  I was merely trying to save “face” or attempt to increase a social standing.  How revolting does that seem in the face of what Peter did?  Peter was THERE.  Peter’s life was on the line.  The guards could have taken him in regardless of his answer.  Can we really, truly blame Peter for his rash answer?

One last thought on Judas.  Matthew tells us that Judas repented when he found out that Jesus had been condemned and returned the 30 pieces of silver and then killed himself.  While there are a number of theories on Judas and why he did what he did, we will most likely never know, in this life, exactly what his reasons were.  We know he turned Jesus over to the Jewish leaders and then regretted his actions.  Judas sincerely thought Jesus’ time was over.  He, as all of the disciples, didn’t understand Jesus’ teachings on his resurrection.  What if Judas had waited just 2 days?  What if he had sought out the other disciples to explain why he did what he did?  If he had, Judas would have been among the disciples when Mary came running to tell them he was back.  Would he have been with Peter and John when they ran to see with their own eyes?  Perhaps this is the lesson we can learn from Judas – to wait before we act or react to an event.  I can think of several situations right now that I can take this lesson to heart.  Actually, I can think of several situations in my life in which all of these lessons apply.  Now, I need to apply them.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

26 weeks


Holy crap. I figured out a few days ago that I am 2 short weeks from the 3rd trimester. I can't believe how quickly the weeks are going by. A couple of weeks ago, I bit the bullet and purchased several maternity tops on ebay. My leftovers from when Maggie was born are a little more casual than I can wear to work. I had kind of forgotten that last time around I borrowed the majority of my maternity clothes. I had very little left that was both acceptable for work and winter! Now that it's getting warmer, my wardrobe will expand to include some skirts and as it gets even warmer, I will be able to include some dresses. If I haven't out grown them by the time it's warm enough.


Sunday, March 7, 2010

Beatle-Mania

We definitely have a Beatle-Maniac in the making. Maggie really loves Beatle Rock Band and now calls "Yellow submarine" her song.


Saturday, March 6, 2010

Lent Reflections: the Garden of Gethsemene

I think I am going to come away from this study with many many more questions than answers. I can remember learning this part of the story growing up, but obviously, not in the detail this study is going into. I know we learned that Jesus asked for the cup to be taken from him, but I don't remember going into the struggle and anguish he was going through.

This part of the story is fairly short; the disciples do not get into the details of the prayer -- probably because they all fell asleep. And really, can you blame them? It had been a very busy week, they had just completed a large meal and then walked 20-25 minutes just to get to the garden where Jesus decided he wanted to pray. It was probably around midnight and they had probably been up since early that morning, and spent the day preparing for the feast. Jesus admonishes them 3 times, and yet I wonder what he had asked of them. The Bible only tells us that he asked them to pray they would not fall into temptation. Did he ask anything else of them? Did he even hint at what was going to happen later that night? We know he also told them they would all turn away from him, as we all do. This is probably another reason this part is short: the disciples do not come out looking well.

These short passages also show the very human side of Jesus. He asked, begged, God to take this away, to find another way. It was God's plan -- why couldn't He change it? Why did it have to happen this way? As a parent, I cannot even fathom coming up with such a plan that would require my only child to be sacrificed in this way.

Adam Hamilton describes this as a time of temptation for Jesus. This seems very logical. Of course, Satan would have Jesus' ear whispering questions, questions that he whispers to me all the time: are you sure this is His plan? Just cut and run or fight, you don't have to just walk into this. Just think about what could happen if you don't do this. It just makes sense that if Jesus was truly human that this would be his biggest temptation. Which makes me wonder why Christians were all up in arms over The Last Tempation of Christ. I understand there was more to it than just controversy over Christ being tempted, but I also understand that many do not want to see the human side of Christ. Isn't it much more wonderful for us that God truly came to Earth as human? That he knows the temptations we go through daily? That He truly understands us?

As part of our study, Brian brought out some of the traditional portraits of Christ in Gesthsemene: the serene Jesus praying at the stone, looking up to Heaven, light shining on him or a halo around him. The Jesus of Tradition that went willingly, with no question, to His destiny that God had written out for him. Later in the small group time, Brian shared with us a Gauguin painting of Gethsemene. In further reading, I discovered that Gauguin used his own face in the painting. How fitting. And isn't that rather the point? That Jesus, in his anguish at Gethsememe became "everyman". He knows us. He knows what it is to be human.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Frantic Friday

Lots of thoughts rambing through my head:

Rocky's cell phone broke about a week ago or so, and yesterday he bought a slick new phone. Not quite the Smart phone variety, but lots of features and it got him thinking about our cell phones vs. having a home phone. When we lived in Michigan, we did not have a home phone, just our cell phones. We were headed that direction in Virginia until Hurricane Isabella hit and everyone was pretty much without cell service or was with very limited cell service. So, we got the home phone and eventually switched over to Virgin Mobile pay as you go plans, which we both really liked, and were very very affordable. I think I paid $20 every 2-3 months for the phone and I could call, text, do videos, photos and send those off as well. When we moved to Montana, we discovered (the hard way) that Sprint/Virgin Mobile does not have coverage in Montana. At all. So after a false start with a "pay as you go" plan (which still had a daily charge just for having the phone), we got a home phone with cell phones through Qwest. Then Qwest changed their cell phone coverage to Verizon. Our contract is up this summer (of course Rocky's phone breaks BEFORE this) and as we could never use up all of our minutes -- I think our plan has 700 minutes/month and last month we used 38 -- we are now looking at getting rid of the home phone and upgrading our plan this summer to allow us to get the Smartphones or Droid. So, I'm going to have to start researching what I want and deciding what I want/need a more complex phone to do for me, beyond making calls. Because honestly, I probably use my cell phone more for taking pictures and videos than actually making calls.

Maggie is falling into Beatle-mania a bit. She really enjoys the Beatles Rock Band game and her new favorite song is "Yellow Submarine". We have video of her and me playing the Rock Band game that I still need to edit and share. My goal for the weekend.

Rocky's garage theatre is coming to be. He purchased an inflatable movie screen (73 inches) and projector. I think he is still looking for the right speakers. But I came home the other night to Maggie and Rocky in the garage watching "Hulk vs. Thor" and after making some supper, we all watched most of "Beauty and the Beast" until it got too chilly in the garage (and I got too uncomfortable in the lawn chair). Rocky has some definite ideas of what movies he wants to show in his theatre, but I think I've talked him into a screening of "The Ten Commandments" -- Charlton Heston and all the cheesiness of that 50s classic movie would be perfect for a warm summer's night in the backyard with lots of popcorn and beer!

I am now 25 weeks pregnant and can't believe I'm almost to the third trimester! It feels like we've been waiting for this for so long and yet, it seems to be going by so fast. It is fun to watch Maggie and her fascinations. This morning, she accidentially, lightly kicked me and ask if she could say she was sorry to the baby and kissed me. I'm feeling the baby moving a lot more. I'm also going back and forth on if the baby is a boy or a girl. Part of me really wants another little girl, if only to be able to use some of those adorable little outfits we got for Maggie. But in all honesty, I don't care and am just looking forward to meeting this little one: who, I realized the other day, could be born on Father's Day!

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Lent Reflections: Wesley Covenant Prayer

At last night's Fuel, I was reminded of this prayer that I heard many years ago at the Presbyterian Church I attended in Boulder, CO. I think it is a wonderful reflection on the Garden of Gethsemene:

I am no longer my own, but thine.
Put me to what thou wilt, rank me with whom thou wilt.
Put me to doing, put me to suffering.
Let me be employed for thee or laid aside for thee,
exalted for thee or brought low for thee.
Let me be full, let me be empty.
Let me have all things, let me have nothing.
I freely and heartily yield all things to thy pleasure and disposal.
And now, O glorious and blessed God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit,
thou art mine, and I am thine.
So be it.
And the covenant which I have made on earth,
let it be ratified in heaven.
Amen.


I will write more about the garden later as I have many many thoughts rambling through my head.